Revisiting the Drama

While going through my cedar chest the other day I came across some of the things that I wrote in High School . I used to write poems and even a few song lyrics when I was all hyped up on teenage drama. Most of my poetry was about love, pain, feeling lonely and the like. The following poem wasn't really written for anyone - although it sounds like it could have been. But I remember writing it. I was "inspired" by a book title and this is what came from it:

I walked last night to a river,

a river running through your heart,

and with the love that I found there

I'm asking for a brand new start.

I looked in the past where you loved me

and I saw where I'd caused you pain.

But the love still inside you has healed that,

you're ready to start over again.

I didn't have to ask for directions

to find where your love for me hid.

But I just couldn't find why you let me

hurt you the way that I did.

Then I saw a part of you before never seen,

hidden away from my outside view;

the part inside of you dying

because of things I've done to you.

I saw that I am part of you,

realized you're part of me too.

Now I feel the pain that I've caused

because I'm dying here inside you.

I realize the hurt that you've suffered,

but I know you hold me inside you still.

If you give me a chance to mend your poor heart,

Love, I promise you that I will.

So...why share this now? Because it is so much in contrast compared to what I might write these days. Even though this wasn't based on a single person, it's pretty indicative of how I viewed relationships. Painful. Hurtful. Dramatic. Blah Blah Blah!

I'm happy to report that all such views of relationships were long ago abandoned. I now know that the best relationships are fulfilling and buoying. They add to your life in such a way that you can't imagine life without them. And these are the type of relationships I now cherish with my husband, my children, my family and a few good friends. Each is very important to me and I hope I let them know how much they really mean to me and how they make my life worth living.