Tuesday, July 17, 2007

My Heartrate is Almost Back to Normal

The kids and I have been sleeping in lately. Yesterday both Isaac and Kenley slept in until 10:00, so I wasn't worried when this morning Kenley still wasn't up by 10:30, but I did crack open her door hoping that the noises the rest of us were making might get her up.
I hopped in the shower and then gave Jack a bath. He likes his bath until I take him out of the water and then he cries a lot. I thought it was weird that Kenley wasn't out of bed with Jack making all that noise so I opened her door all the way to check on her. Her bed was empty, but I wasn't too concerned because I figured I hadn't heard her get out of her room over Jack's crying. But then I went in the living room and still didn't see her. Isaac was in there and I asked him if Kenley had come out. He said she hadn't.
My heart started pounding. All I could picture was her empty bed. I ran back into her room, yelling her name, hoping that she really was laying in her bed and my eyes had played a trick on me. Still empty. I checked her window...locked. Where is my daughter?
The doorbell rang, I was praying that if Kenley had somehow gotten out of the house that it was a neighbor bringing her back home. It was my mom. "I can't find Kenley!" I practically scream at her. We both start looking through the house frantic and terrified.
I knew the house had been locked. We always lock our doors at night and we never leave the kids' windows open. Jeremiah locks the door behind him on his way out to work if I'm still asleep. I had to unlock the back door to see if she was outside. I couldn't see her anywhere.
I tried to call Jeremiah to find out if he had checked on her before he left for work. Then I realized he's not in his office today. I went back into Kenley's room. I looked under the bed. All I could see was a blanket...but it was the blanket we put her to bed with last night. I tugged at the blanket and see her little pajama'd feed beneath. I'm relieved, but only for a moment...
Then I had a new fear. She was home, but she was under the bed and I couldn't tell if she was breathing. I pulled at her feet and she started to whimper. I lifted up the bed and she crawled out, starting to cry. Music to my ears. I thought she had been taken from me. I was seconds away from calling the police.
I can't tell you the terrifying thoughts that passed through my mind while we couldn't find her. There are so many crazy, evil and desperate people who wouldn't think anything of taking another's child for their own needs. I cannot imagine what we would have gone through had someone really abducted her.

How could I be without her? How could I be without any of my kids? I embraced her and grabbed Isaac for a hug and thanked the Lord that I still had them. I hope I never have to feel the pain of losing a child. I don't know how anyone can handle that kind of heartache and my heart reaches out to those who have.


seantam00 said...

Wow, how scary. Thank goodness you were able to find her and she was alright, but I bet those few minutes looking for her were awful.

Katie said...

How awful! I feel your pain. We've had to have the "When Momma's calling you, you HAVE to come see what she needs. Never hide from Momma!" talk at our house more than once. I once found Isaac in the lilac bushes seconds before calling the police, too. It's terrifying.